Monday, August 11, 2008

INDECISION 08: INFLATE YOUR TIRES: DAILY SHOW WRITERS

Here is a special segment taken from the Jon Stewart Comedy Central "Daily Show" writers.

I hope you will get a good laugh out of this:

Comment by BILL CORCORAN, editor of CORKSPHERE

August 10th at 2:00PM
From the Writers of The Daily Show: Inflate Your Tires!

POSTED BY: TheInDecider
http://blog.indecision2008.com/2008/08/10/from-the-writers-of-the-daily-show-inflate-your-tires/

This week, Barack Obama publicly suggested making sure tires are properly inflated as one way of dealing with the rising price of gas. At the Sturgis motorcycle rally, McCain mocked his opponent's recommendation, exclaiming, "Barack Obama wants you to inflate your tires!" He added...

* "We should be able to inflate our tires with oil! And then burn them to heat our homes. Even in summer! Which would then require us to run the air conditioning!"

* "This is America! I inflate my tires with oil! I charcoal-grill everything! I don't need you coming around with your fancy, 'use the off switches on your appliances' talk! If I don't keep my refrigerator door open, how'm I going to be able to see what's in there from across the room?

What'm I supposed to do? Take my constantly-idling ride-on lawnmower over there?"

* "I should be able to use my dishwasher to wash one dish at a time! I don't want my forks mingling with my spoons! I should be able to brush my teeth by running my dishwasher! And I should be able to keep my refrigerator door open -- that way, my dog can fetch me a beer!"

* "While I'm at it, I want to fill my windshield wiper fluid with Strawberry Quik!"

* "We should be able to plug our A/C unit into the cigarette adapter! Fuck it -- put a boat motor in there 'with' the motor, have 'em both running! Take that car, keep it running to power the air conditioning in the motor home that I'm also towing, and put all on the back of a bigger truck that's driving to the oil-burning FESTIVAL!"

No comments: